Have you ever sat on a bass stool that was bad to the bone? I don’t mean some vaguely uncomfortable, scruffy, mangy, chewed up old wooden stool or a squeaky bar stool designed to elicit annoyed glances from all the cellists in front of you.
I’m talking about a stool that actually seems designed to cause posterior havoc, to eat through your trousers and send pain stabbing up into your back and down into the soles of your feet.
Well, friends, I am quite familiar with a stool like this…a whole set of stools, actually, and they are, believe it or not, the old Chicago Symphony bass stools. Though I initially felt a sense of pride as I sat on the same stools as these guys used (or used to use), the novelty quickly wore off with the wicked chafing I received while using these instruments of destruction.
How those guys managed to endure these things is completely beyond me. I’ve been using them for Symphony Center gigs in Chicago for over 10 years; they get distributed to the second stringer groups that come through the home of the Chicago Symphony, sending scores of hapless bassists wincing back to their cars in the parking garage after performances.
Though they might not look as fearsome as I’m making them out to be from these photos, believe me: they are. Under that black pad is an evil aluminum ring of death, an uncomfortable metallic circle with no actual pad in the middle. Whether this was a result of years of use, a bizarre design choice, or some cruel prank played on visiting bass players, I’m not sure, but the result is like sitting perched on the open end of an oil drum. Ever sit on the edge of an open oil drum…and then try to play bass? Try it sometime and you’ll see what I’m talking about.
Wriggle Wriggle
The pain begins the same every time. First, the evil aluminum circle cuts off all circulation to my legs. I then begin this kind of weird seesawing motion to bring back some feeling, which probably looks to an outside observer like, well…. I don’t even want to think about it!
My lower back hunches, vertebrae creaking uncomfortably into an unnatural contortion, my shoulders hunching like some sort of neanderthal as I try to shift my weight around to no avail. Everything in my body starts to seize up, until I feel like I’m playing with bandages wrapped tightly around all my limbs and torso. I swivel the darn thing around, trying to find a comfortable position and probably putting on a great obsessive-compulsive sideshow to the rehearsal or concert.
Also, I know I’m not the only one; my colleagues on these same stools have a look on their faces like an ill wind has wafted through the bass section by this point. We all look like a miserable, squirmy bunch of folks up there, I’m sure, undoubtedly making for an unusual impression upon the audience.
These things are truly a pile of pain, designed at every turn to destroy the posterior of any bassist unfortunate enough to encounter them. Where’s the ButtCradle (video link) when you need it?
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Padding? Why in my day padding on a bass stool would have been a luxury. We had to sit on plywood stools that—no wait–they wouldn’t LET us sit down. We had to learn how to fall asleep while standing AND holding our bass. This became the basis for my book ‘Learn Lucid Dreaming while Playing in a Symphony Orchestra.’ With every order comes a pair of glasses that makes it look like your eyes are open. $9.95 at Walmart.
1 word: stand.
Your Pal,
Jacque
I agree with the above comment regarding standing. I’ve invested about 1000 dollars in various stools, and contraptions to make bass playing more “comfortable”…One day I had a gig where I couldn’t bring my stool and I was forced to stand and I realized I couldn’t play. I think bass players need to be much more flexible in how they approach the instrument. It seems that a lot of orchestral bass players are doing their body more harm but sitting than they realize…
Thank you for this. I agree completely. Do you have a suggestion for the most comfortable, most adjustable, simplest, and lightest stool that is ergonomic and that most bassists would find comfortable?
Hi,
you are talking about the least comfortable stool for double bass.
But what do you think is the MOST comfortable stool?
I have always played standing. But I am considering buying a stool now. But most of them are really expensive. Is a drumstool also doing the job?
thanks, Huub